Dreams. We all have them. I once had this dream about wanting to write all day in this perfect little office and being this wonderful mother to this beautiful little boy (yes it was during my first wave of baby craze). I had just gone back to school and it was an actual thing we had to do. We had to take time out of our day and think about what it is that is going to make us happy. A job or family or yeah. I chose where I wanted to be in ten years. I was 20 when I did that and wrote it done. It was very detailed. Like Hero I think of that little boy, from time to time. (Wondering if I would be a good mother.)
I should say goals. Or the most popular term the bucket list. I was involved in someone’s bucket list last year and it was a wonderful and freeing experience that made me realize and go for things that were either to late or just in time...i say just in time because now I am back in school and loving every minute of it. It was sky-diving. It was the best this I did last year...I mean aside from going back to school.
So anyway I told a friend of mind tonight about dreams. Mainly because he told me one of his. He’s trusting me and I like that. I get a sense of trust when he tells me things. I mean with the latest in my great depressing adventure into the dark, he’s been this little light that makes me laugh. A friend reminding me of my own words. I’ve helped him out a lot as well. Its a growing trust between the two of us.
He said that his dream was stupid. Its so not stupid. (not going to share because its his to share and I’m not going to cross a line.) I had told him that it was a very beautiful dream and should share it with anyone and everyone. I could get the feeling that he was extremely happy about talking about it. Which is what I was aiming for. He was sad about something that had happened before we were talking. So anyway. It said that it was unattainable, he wasn’t going to leave the country....
I get that no one likes to travel. I personal think I would like it given that I travel more.
So in reply to his unattainable dream, is - they feed us, the imagination, driving us towards something. Even if we don’t achieve it, its there and it makes you smile. Bashfully in this state of complete happy giggly (alright I tossed in the giggle just now because I honestly believe that he would giggle. A man giggle, chuckle.) His dream is honestly a very good one and he should work towards it. He should keep learning Italian. In fact I am going to encourage this. I’m already trying to learn it myself.
Dude this friend of mine makes me happy. He makes me happy in the way that my Baby does. Shoot the shit and laugh it off.
So back to dreams and goals to my bucket list.
I’m not actually going to publish my list...still kinda working on it.
- Learn French and Italian
- Bungee jumping
- Live in England for a year. (I actually really want to do this !!)
- Learn to cook a dish in Italy
- Learn to sing a French song in France
- Play a very small, horribly small, part in a Shakespeare play
- Write a story that can make another person, who isn’t me, tear up or any of the other emotions
- Learn to dance (ballroom, salsa, belly etc...dance)
- Throw a drink in someone’s face (not of my nicest of choices I just think that it would be fun)
Thats all that I have for right now...its a work in progress. I have so much more that I would like to add and would love to get done. I just can’t share everything right now. My mind is moving somewhere else...
....I have plans for tomorrow to find a special spot for myself outside that can bring me some kind of happiness. I’m looking forward to it.